Dear Hobbs Publishing,
I am no expert on running a business, nor am I knowledgable in any part about publishing, but after reviewing your website, I felt compelled to suggest a few changes to your overall business strategy.
1. As a writer, myself, who has considered self publishing a few times and submitted to major publishing houses as well, I find that I am most easily swayed in my opinion of a company based on the spelling, punctuation and grammatical errors on the site. What kind of writer wants their publisher to be illiterate? You may want to utilize the spellcheck ability that accompanies most Word programs these days. If somehow you dont have access to one, many can be found online. Just copy and paste your text into the box and tell it to check for spelling. A few misplaced commas wont make or break a deal, but spelling errors are a no-no.
2. I'm a little confused regarding your current "special offer". $949 to convert a manuscript into Microsoft Word format, then put it on a cd. That offer was going about a year ago when I first learned about your company, which leads me to believe that you either a.) dont update your site, or b.) are incredibly stubborn in your belief that you can get that much money just to put a manuscript on cd. I personally have my manuscript in digital format already as I typed it out in microsoft word to begin with. Few people still use type writers or the old pen and ink approach, so perhaps you should add something to the special offer to make it a bit less "special" and a bit more "realistic". I would suggest actually printing the book.
3. Your website is not viewer friendly. While the colors you have chosen are quite pleasing, the random quotes with even more random use of italics and bolding of letters/words is semi-stupid looking. It detracts from the overall message you're trying to send.
4. Uh, what message ARE you trying to send? From what I gather, you only have one customer who is also listed as a partner. What work did you actually do for him? Does he have anything positive to say about the company? Why dont you have any other customers? (*ahem* $949? Really?) I also think you should rephrase your motivational quote of "When you have your books printed, Many people will probably want to buy your book!". "Probably" really isnt the best way to convince someone. And nevermind the fact that you dont offer printing services in the first place.
5. What do you actually sell? Are you a real company?
In short, I appreciate your efforts in trying to break into the world of publishing as I am struggling through the same thing. I hope my suggestions can be of some use to you in the future. You may want to try some advertising as well... I'm just saying.
Thank you for your time.
Sincerely,
Scary
(P.S. Rainbow colored comic sans doesnt convince me that you design unique book covers. Try again.)
Friday
How many 6's in "History"?
I have developed a new problem.This isn't really news- as I am certain I am at all times in possession of 20+ psychoses, but this one has made life a bit more interesting.
As a writer, it should come as no shock that I have a myspace, facebook, and twitter... that I am fond of writing long email, constantly scribbling words I like, phrases, and poems wherever there is blank paper... All of that comes with the territory.
The fun begins with the fact that my short term recall has been damaged.
If I send an email, update my status, or do any form of writing, my instant recall of what I wrote comes back as if its been translated into Chinese, transcribed as such into painted calligraphy on wet paper- therefore smearing beyond recognition, "signed" to a deaf man who then retranslates from Chinese sign language into modern English and transcribed again... upside down... on a mirror.
I kid you not.
My recall really involves misspellings, grammatically incorrect phrases, improper punctuation, and misuse of words. I constantly have to go back and reread things to make sure I'm typing in English.
I always am... its very rare that I'll see a misspelled word, etc... but without fail, as soon as I go into my mental filing cabinet to pull out a copy of what I JUST typed out, there's a short in the wiring, and its just gibberish and vowels.
As a writer, it should come as no shock that I have a myspace, facebook, and twitter... that I am fond of writing long email, constantly scribbling words I like, phrases, and poems wherever there is blank paper... All of that comes with the territory.
The fun begins with the fact that my short term recall has been damaged.
If I send an email, update my status, or do any form of writing, my instant recall of what I wrote comes back as if its been translated into Chinese, transcribed as such into painted calligraphy on wet paper- therefore smearing beyond recognition, "signed" to a deaf man who then retranslates from Chinese sign language into modern English and transcribed again... upside down... on a mirror.
I kid you not.
My recall really involves misspellings, grammatically incorrect phrases, improper punctuation, and misuse of words. I constantly have to go back and reread things to make sure I'm typing in English.
I always am... its very rare that I'll see a misspelled word, etc... but without fail, as soon as I go into my mental filing cabinet to pull out a copy of what I JUST typed out, there's a short in the wiring, and its just gibberish and vowels.
Oh, there is!?
Repetition is funny when its coming from someone else.
If you watch Laurel and Hardy, and you see that piano falling down the steps- its still as funny the 17th time as it was the first. But that's outside your body. That's not attached. Its humor for humor's sake.
Now, my brain, while being humorous on accident, has a problem with repeating a joke if it thinks its particularly funny.
Of course, I'm allowing quite a bit here by assuming the constant repeats are from humor, not short term memory loss.
I used to see a particular billboard everyday when I was driving...
It said, very plainly, "Yes, There IS A Minimally Invasive Surgery For That."
Instantly, I felt myself sigh with relief and say "Oh, good. I was wondering..."
Then, of course, I giggled to myself. Billboards that answer questions I haven't asked never fail to prompt me into some form of gratitude.
That was the first time I saw it...
The second time I saw it, I once again couldn't deny myself the instant sigh of relief and "Oh, man, I was worried..." response. The third, forth and subsequent trips all ended the same way... "Oh! Good! Hey, babe, did you hear that? There IS a minimally invasive surgery for this!" ... every...single....time....
It wasn't until one of the last times I drove past it that the response, as usual, made its appearance, but it was followed by the other part of my brain replying with an "Okay! I GET IT! VERY FUNNY! STOP NOW!" ....
The halves of my brain had become aware of themselves again. One making the same joke over and over, the other getting increasingly irritated by it, and somehow unable to stop.
I was quite pleased when I realized I didn't have to drive that way anymore. The arguing in my cranium was louder than the stereo, no matter how much I turned it up...
If you watch Laurel and Hardy, and you see that piano falling down the steps- its still as funny the 17th time as it was the first. But that's outside your body. That's not attached. Its humor for humor's sake.
Now, my brain, while being humorous on accident, has a problem with repeating a joke if it thinks its particularly funny.
Of course, I'm allowing quite a bit here by assuming the constant repeats are from humor, not short term memory loss.
I used to see a particular billboard everyday when I was driving...
It said, very plainly, "Yes, There IS A Minimally Invasive Surgery For That."
Instantly, I felt myself sigh with relief and say "Oh, good. I was wondering..."
Then, of course, I giggled to myself. Billboards that answer questions I haven't asked never fail to prompt me into some form of gratitude.
That was the first time I saw it...
The second time I saw it, I once again couldn't deny myself the instant sigh of relief and "Oh, man, I was worried..." response. The third, forth and subsequent trips all ended the same way... "Oh! Good! Hey, babe, did you hear that? There IS a minimally invasive surgery for this!" ... every...single....time....
It wasn't until one of the last times I drove past it that the response, as usual, made its appearance, but it was followed by the other part of my brain replying with an "Okay! I GET IT! VERY FUNNY! STOP NOW!" ....
The halves of my brain had become aware of themselves again. One making the same joke over and over, the other getting increasingly irritated by it, and somehow unable to stop.
I was quite pleased when I realized I didn't have to drive that way anymore. The arguing in my cranium was louder than the stereo, no matter how much I turned it up...
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
