So as I wrote the last blog, I was thinking about other examples of when my brain let me down.... smaller things that I couldnt devote a single story to, so I figured I'd do a compilation...
The first time I became fully aware of my brain playing tricks on me was on my way home one night. I'm not entirely sure where I was driving home from, but thats unimportant. I was stopped at a red light- multiple cars stopped beside me. Just sitting...tapping on the steering wheel, not thinking about anything inparticular... just sitting.
Then, out of nowhere, my brain ganged up on me. They plotted and decided before saying "Pssst. Just go. Go now."
So, in obedience to the brain stem, my foot stepped on the gas and I went. The light was still red, and I'm fairly certain I was looking around at the other drivers in complete bewilderment...could my hands have obeyed the other part of my brain, I'd have scribbled a "Please help! I'm being held hostage!" note on a piece of paper and plastered it to the window.
I STILL dont know what posessed me to do that...
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3 years ago, around this time, I was christmas shopping at JC Penny with my mom and dad. Its always fun hanging out with them so I was in a good mood- looking around at the christmas decor, being completely overwhelmed with the happy, warm fuzzies that come that time of year. I've learned now that my brain is at its worst when I'm overwhelmed with stimulation of the visual sort.
I remember looking at a glass case of rings. Lots of rings... and with a case big enough to where merely pointing at one does no good. Your finger is still nearly a foot away from the dang thing and depending on the angle of the person you are telling about the ring, they could think you're pointing at a million different ones.
"I like that one." I said to my mother.
"Which one?" she replied, as I had known she would.
So i dug into my vocabulary and said "the one with the swirls on it." - carefully describing half the rings beneath my finger.
"Which one?" she asked again.
"The one with the swirls on it." I repeated. Perhaps I thought she hadnt heard me.
"Which one with the swirls on it?" she asked, acknowledging she had infact heard it.
"The ONE with the swirls on it." I said... she just sighed at me.
"The one with the SWIRLS on it." again... I wasnt making any sense. My brain continued to reiterate that if I just emphasized a different word in the sentence, eventually she'd understand. "The one WITH the swirls on it." At this point, my dad is wheezing, which is making me laugh, but increasing my frustration. I'm sure I continued until I had adequately covered each word in that sentence.
I dont remember if she ever figured out what ring I meant...
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A few moments later, perusing a nicely stacked pyramid of watches, oohing and aahing over the cute charms attached to some, and discussing my ability to describe swirls (to which my dad was STILL laughing)... I found a watch.
It was the coolest looking thing ever and had skulls and crossbones on it. My excitement grew and the necessity to show it to my parents became unbearable.
"Look at this one!" I said to my dad. "Its so cute! It has charms you can change on it." (so far so good.) Dad turned to look. I specifically wanted to point out the skulls. But again, in my excitement, my ability to speak proper english began to fail.
"It has..." (pause) ...I began waiting for the right word to come. If dad saw me struggling, he didnt betray his knowledge, probably hoping for another Sari Special Word Vomit moment... my brain began to feed me words. Most of which were completely wrong... I tried to make associations... where does one see skull and crossbones? Pirate ships!
"It has... pirate..." (pause) ... why the word "skull" hadnt come to me, I dont know... but I was still on the right track with pirates... I just had to describe the part I needed! "pirate stuff" would have worked at that point. Dad would have nodded in agreement. But no. My brain was being far too helpful. Skull... skull... whats the word? I know its part of the general make up of a human. Its like a head without skin. Ah ha!
"It has... pirate heads on it!" I finally announced. Dad lost it.
I'm sure part of that was due to the immediate 'wait-thats-not-the-right-word' face I made, and most likely an immediate narration of my inner thoughts that followed similiar to "thats not what I meant to say..."
I think dad was crying before we left the store.
I'd probably cry too... if I hadnt felt so proud of myself in that fleeting moment of arriving at what I thought was an accurate description.
